"Our life is frittered away by detail...simplify, simplify." - Henry David Thoreau

I know I said "blog like no one is reading" but it's nice to know these people are

Tuesday, May 5, 2009

Talking about the Blog in Real Life

Cindy over at Figs, Lavender & Cheese (one of my favourite blog names) wrote a post about getting together with some fellow bloggers in San Francisco and heading out to wine country for a little nature, food, wine and blog talk. The photos of their meals will make you salivate but the fun they had getting to know one another in Real Life just made me jealous. The comments people made about the post were telling and many echoed exactly how I feel about telling people in my RL about my blog.
One astute commenter said "It is often awkward to start a conversation- "this woman on this blog I read--" so I have started saying "this woman I know", hoping I don't hear "from where?" because the answer "online" sounds a little creepy."

That is so true. I read so many interesting blogs and very opinionated comments that it is hard not to repeat them in RL conversations. The first couple of times I made mention of my blog I mostly got, "Really, I don't even have the time to go on facebook." (That's a slam from another mother if I ever heard one.) Then I would get "Really, what is it about?" My explanation usually goes something along the lines of, "Well, it is my way of getting back into writing after an 11 year hiatus," or " It's a way to have contact with the outside world while sitting at my desk all day doing mundane things for our family business." You can just picture the glazed over look this provokes.

Why is it so hard to explain to the non-blogging world what it is like to wake up itching to see what late night rants Dr. Monkey Muck has written or what toils and tribulations One Glass at a Time has been through over the weekend or even what gorgeous photos of Paris Simply Photo has posted. Every day I add another to my Must Read list. I am disappointed when there isn't anything new to read. What's the deal? Did you have to go and make dinner or get to work on time or something?

I have to admit that I also rush in from running errands to see if I have any new comments on my most recent, and what I considered, most brilliant post. I make notes to myself all the time - while I wait to pick up the boys, while I am in the car (I pull over, usually) at night while I am reading or watching TV. My family has noticed all this but so far everyone seems to ignore it unless they see a photo of themselves on the screen and then you'd think they were famous, they get so excited. Don't want to break it to them that they are known only to 13 followers, one of whom is their great aunt.

I hesitated using the term "Real Life" in the title of this post since I consider what I write about to be very real and I am sure what I read is all too real for many bloggers. Just because it is online doesn't make it any less so. We're not having sex or gambling away our kids' university fund or drinking ourselves under the table. No, we just talk/write alot about doing those things. Why do we still consider things done online creepy? The bastion of middle-aged men who live in their parent's basements and play war games in their Stormtrooper Helmets.

This blogging thing is very hard to explain - the connections, the friendships. I did have one friend who was very interested and I told her all about the women who flew from across the continent to attend the funeral of another blogger's daughter. None of them, as far as I know, had ever met in RL. Or the outpouring of support, emotional and financial for Braja in India who was in a terrible car accident. The friendships are real, as are the connections and in this somewhat fragmented world where we may or may not live close to family that counts for alot. So I, for one, will continue to read about your children and spouses. I will feel better knowing that I am not the only one who loses it with either of the above and I will live vicariously through the bright young things who blog about fashion and style. I will continue to make notes on the fantastic recipes and drool over the food photos and be inspired by the elegant rooms in the many design blogs. It's a strange and wonderful world out there and even if I can't explain it very well it is a real part of my life.


  1. Brilliantly said Cid. The connection with these invisible people is so hard to explain, but it's so awesome, it's sick.

  2. That was very well said and I have found myself in the same situation before as well. Unless people are on blogs, they clearly don't get it.

    Have a great week.


  3. I love blogging and all of the relationships that I have made!

  4. I also say "a friend of mine" when talking about blogging buddies...like you said, many times, people just don't get it and I don't like to explain all the time. Of course, my students are different....if I say "my friend", usually someone will ask "blogging or one you've met"?
    I'm getting very excited about the possible meeting up with some friends this summer...I hope they like the real me!! :-D

    I too love blogging and it has saved me many a time when I was feeling lonely or homesick or sad....there is always someone to "talk to" here!!
    and you? I'm so glad to have met you!

  5. Hi! I'm stopping by to pick up your url for The Book Review Club. And I definitely know what you mean about the blogging world...

  6. So true, so true! I too make notes to myself on what to write next, and check my comments more than I probably should.

    And I think I share more honestly in my blog than I do with many of my friends, except those I'm closest to. So of course anyone who bothers to read my posts, and then comment about it, I feel like we've had coffee together, even if he or she lives in London or Paris (and how cool is that?!!). Because of blogging, I get to find out how someone in Australia or Canada or New York spent their day, and visa versa. It also makes the world seem a friendlier place because now anyone I run into could be a potential reader. So over time, of course it's only natural to feel invested in these other lives. It's not like television where we watch but don't interact and the characters can't interact with us. It's real life, real people connected to other real people.


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